My sister married a man who goes into a rage when a tiny turtle walks in while his little girl is washing off the back porch with a hose. What was a perfect relationship of playing games on the floor and hugging each other became repeated complaints to our mother that I am making him angry. "When he becomes upset, it's the person's fault for letting it go that far. You have problems too." He forced our father to wait in the cold while he caught a fish (after others did) after it got dark and the others went back home. He forced our sister to wait in the car while he ran errands and she was tired from a long plane ride and he was supposed to just take her home to rest. He has shaken his fists at me for saying "Shhh" and at people in public. She said "I understand his frustration." When he was alone with my shy wife he screamed at her accusing her of "breaking" his printer when it ran out of ink. (1) What do you call his behavior and those who do it? (2) What do you call the change in the relationship I had with my sister? (3) How do I best handle the great pain it has caused me? I have tried to be open and rational, but to no avail. Help!